Forty-four categories is far too much for something as fundamentally lame as the People’s Choice Awards, Lu and I have decided, but we’re married to this idea now, so we’re obligated to finish it. So here it is: the final installment of State of Affairs Versus The People’s Choice Awards. Today: MUSIC AND EVERYTHING ELSE THEY COULDN’T FIND A CATEGORY FOR.
My dear readers, you may have noticed a trend here at State of Affairs lately: namely, guest blogs. The fact is I’ve had less and less time to devote to the blog over the last few months for a variety of reasons (only a few of which I’m able to talk about), but despite my inability to update, we have come too far together for me to abandon you and my precious webspace to internet anonymity. So I pick the best and the brightest of my Correspondents to fill in for me during this tumultuous time. Among my favourite bloggers on the interwebs is my good friend Lu Galasso from Inching Towards Mediocrity who has been featured here at SoA in the past, and he’s kindly agreed to fill in another of his famous Best Of Lists for today’s installment. Take it away Lu!
It’s been 8 long years with Georgy boy with his finger on the trigger and I’ve been following their activities very closely. I’m almost a little sad to see them go (not really). Every morning I used to wake up and check the news to see the next scandal or currupt thing that Bush & Co. had done to the American people. It was like my own personal soap opera except with real life implicaitons and a better story line. It’s too bad Hunter Thompson killed himself. I think he would have liked to be around to see the Emporer relinquish his power. It went from bad to worse, and now it seems like things are going to turn around- hopefully.
So on this day, George W. Bush’s last day in office, I thought I would reflect on his presidency and write a list of my favourite moments with one of the worst presidents in history. Some are funny, some are scary, some are just sad. Here’s the list, in no particular order:
1) 9/11 – Bush reads to 2nd graders and looks stupid instead of taking command of the situation. Meanwhile Dick Cheney is left in charge at a NATO bunker.
2) Mission Accomplished – What kind of asshole flies in on a jet pretending to be a figher pilot in front of REAL pilots to tell them that their job in Iraq is over. Hmmm.. I belive the death toll is now 4,500 and 1000 dead in Afghanistan. You gotta have a lot of balls or be really stupid to pull off this stunt.
3) Katrina – “You’ve done a heck of a job, Brownie.” No that’s not my favourite. But, instead of landing Air Force One and making his presense known, the lovable Dubya flies to John McCain’s birthday party to cut the cake. Way to care assface.
4) Stephen Colbert’s Roast – You’ve got to hand it to Stephen. To stand there and verbally destroy the media and Bush in one go is pretty ballsy. It’s too bad Cheney wasn’t there. Actually, it probably for the best. Stephen might have been shot in the face.
5) Cheney Shoots His Lawyer – Speaking of shooting someone in the face, I think this is by far my favourite moment. You know you are above the law when you can shoot somoene in the face and then they apologize to you. Note to self: Never go hunting with evil old men.
Although there’s a lot more I could list, these moments are the ones that really made me sit up straight in my chair and say “I can’t believe that just happened!” I don’t expect Obama to be this exciting, so I’m not really sure what to do with myself anymore. Maybe write a screenplay? I do have to finish that great American novel I was working on.