Folks, I’m not going to lie when I say a lot of things piss me off about the world. Everywhere you look things are getting worse. I’m not trying to be pessimistic, it’s just the way things are. War, famine, insane natural disasters, the butchering of the ending of Lost. It’s hard not to wonder how we’re going to make it to the next century. If we do, it’s going to take some serious cognitive reformations before anything changes.
Now before we get into some serious existential discussion about the meaning of life, I want to talk about what’s on the top of my list that needs to be dismantled: religion. In all seriousness, how has organized religion ever done anything other than increase the size of the vatican’s purse? Although I could go on a rant for days about it, I’ll let Saint Carlin do it for me:
Hello again, loyal readers. I’m currently away from the Compound for a photo shoot that’s unrelated to anything I do here at State of Affairs, but in the interest of giving you something fun and/or educational to read today (you know, because you always come here for educational purposes) I’ve enlisted my Correspondent, the Reverend Dwight Q. Fitch, to tell you about his incredible new publication. (ed. note: Reverend Dwight Q. Fitch may or may not be an ordained minister. I didn’t ask. I don’t want to know.) So enjoy this Thursday’s SoA Guest Blog, and have a great weekend.
Time to put the kids to bed and forgo the usual pasty preamble, my dear readers, because I’m going to get right into it today.
The internet is awesome, but sometimes it pisses me off. “But Alex”, you might be saying, “the internet is your bread and butter! How can you ever be angry at something that loves you so much? Why won’t you love me back? Was it something I said? I’ll make it up to you any way I can, I promise! I’ll nag less! I’ll stop sleeping around! Just come back, baby!”
The following is an Original State of Affairs Stage Play. It is a work of fiction, and any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is completely on purpose. It is a matter of public record that Pat Robertson is this big a prick, and we can only hope God Almighty is half this cool. The writer would like to acknowledge the contributions of Brent Chittenden for suggesting the topic.